Happiness By Elimination

Lately I've been thinking and talking to others a lot about my new concept - happiness by elimination.

You see I frequently receive positive feedback about the ideas I promote via The Happiness Institute but if there's one "negative" comment I/we get its that people think they don't have time to implement the principles of positive psychology we recommend.

Its not that people don't think they'll work but that they think they don't have time to make them work.

So, I've developed this new concept by which you don't need MORE time for happiness but, in fact, LESS time because this approach to happiness focuses more on eliminating, rather than adding, things to your life.

So try this:

- Identify at least one thing in your life about which you're not happy; at least one thing that causes irritation or frustration or distress
- find a way to get it out of your life!
- stop it; outsource it; delegate it to someone else; replace it with something else; change the way you do it...etc.

Give this idea, happiness by elimination, a try and let me know how you fare!

11/5/2007 8:00:00 AM
Dr. Timothy Sharp
I completed three degrees in psychology including a B.Sc. (Hons), a Masters degree in Clinical Psychology and a Ph.D., before working for many years as a clinical and academic psychologist. My main focus these days is in the area of positive psychology and happiness with my time predominately devoted to enhancing happ...
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Comments
That's a wonderful concept. But, when your biggest stressors fall into the "accept the things you can not change" catergory, I doesn't help very much. But thanks for shedding light on something we may very well overlook. Just let go of what irritates us: my kid's old broken toys that she leaves every where, I felt guilty for thinking about getting rid of them til your advice made me realize I could and the world would not come to an end.
Posted by LaTannya
I've been making a habit of picking one thing a week I want to focus on, whether it's an attribute, or something I'd like to improve. If I focus hard on that one thing, I can get some good results. Sometimes I get so caught up in life, that I forget to work on my weekly thing. Any thoughts on staying focused on that one thing, or is it simply a matter of being passionate about it?
Posted by CET
Interesting. Thx for the advice.
Posted by Layne
Hi. Today is my son's 2nd Birthday and I am eliminating all his baby(0 - 12+mo) toys. He doesn't play with all of them and he has a whole new set of toys for his birthday. :)
Posted by Charlotte
Prior to reading your blog today I did something very similar and felt much better when I received confirmation that "this thing" was GONE! If Layne still needs help I know a couple of guys in Brooklyn that may be able to help him with the ex-wife. Just kidding:)
Posted by Neil
My younger brother came about to live with me about 2 years ago. He was just 19 then. I love my brother dearly, but our relationship has never been ideal. I am 10 years older than him, in many ways I have tried to act more like a mother than a sibling. That is not always easy, I don't think siblings should try to fill a role that is clearly meant for a parent. But, I am the next best thing. Lately, I have noticed that I am acting more like I was when I was a teenager. Annoyed and irritated. I acted like this my entire adolescent when I was taking care of my brother. It's not his fault. I think that for the past two years, he has really matured and has enough life skills to be able to support himself. Although I feel guilty for my decision and generally worried about him, I think it is the best thing that I can do for him. Afterall, he really doesn't need me to tell him what to do. He is self-sufficient and he makes his own decisions.
Posted by Toni
I don't pretend to have any simple answers for complex problems but the following may well be helpful: Change what you can change, Accept what you can't change, and be wise enough to know the difference!
Posted by Dr. Timothy Sharp
Dr Sharp, an interesting concept indeed. What about sources of stress and frustration that you simply cannot just "eliminate" from your life, an ex-wife for example? In my case it is impossible as we share custody of our two sons.
Posted by Layne

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